Acceptance: seeing, feeling, and acknowledging things
as they are in the present moment.
Acceptance does not mean passivity, resignation, or agreement.
It allows a clear perception of the present that informs our actions.
– Janice Marturano
(from her book, Finding the Space To Lead)
One of the fundamental principles upon which Transformational Presence work is based is that energy cannot be created or destroyed; it can only be transformed. Translated into everyday, practical application, it means that we can’t get rid of anything. Nor, in fact, can we create something completely new. There is no circumstance or situation, feeling or emotion, belief or opinion that we can simply get rid of. Nor can we create a new situation, feeling, or belief out of nothing. We can only take “what is” in the moment and partner with it to transform it into something else.
“Co-creation” is becoming a more accepted term in the mainstream consciousness. Most people tend to think of co-creation as something that happens between two or more people. Yet we are also constantly co-creating with ideas, beliefs, circumstances, and situations. Every day, we are faced with challenges and opportunities. As each challenge or opportunity arises, it becomes our next co-creative partner. It offers us an invitation to dance. We can choose whether or not to accept the invitation, but the invitation is always there. If we say “yes,” we step into the possibility of co-creation. If we say “no,” there is no possibility of co-creation, and, in fact, a very good chance that the situation will drain us of energy.
In order to co-create with anything, whether it is a person, an idea, a belief, or a circumstance, we must first accept it as it is. Acceptance is simply an acknowledgement of “what is.” It doesn’t necessarily mean that we like it or that we are happy about it. It just means that we accept that this is the reality for the moment.
If we refuse to accept the current circumstance, we cannot work with it. Without acceptance, we push against it. Pushing against it actually feeds the challenge. It gives energy to what we will not accept rather than feeding energy to the transformation that is waiting to unfold. Acceptance of “what is,” on the other hand, opens the door for co-creation.
Co-creation begins by being curious and seeking out the greater potential that is hidden within the circumstance. In Transformational Presence work, we say that a problem is not something to be solved; it is a message to be listened to. The Hermetic Principle of Polarity tells us that a problem cannot exist unless its solution is also present. A conflict cannot exist unless its resolution is also possible. Therefore, a challenge cannot exist unless there is also an opportunity. And in the same way, any significant opportunity offers us a challenge to stretch and grow.
Accepting “what is” is essential if we want to move on. As you consider the current challenges and opportunities in your life or leadership, what must you accept in order to be able to co-create with it?
P.S. To read more about accepting “what is,” see pages 181 – 183 of my latest book, Create A World That Works. For more on the Principle of Polarity, see pages 116 – 118 in the same book. Create A World That Works is also available in digital format.
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